Category: Employee Development

When it comes to personal development and habit formation, one name invariably comes to mind: James Clear. Renowned for his expertise in habit formation, Clear has sold more than 5 million copies of his bestselling book, Atomic Habits. Backed by science and easily understandable, his practical strategies for making life-altering improvements through small, manageable changes have made him the go-to expert for anyone seeking to reshape their habits and transform their lives.

In a recent episode of A Bit of Optimism, which you can listen to here, Simon asked Clear if there is a way to anyone to get a firmer grasp on managing habits, both good and bad. He also asked Clear to explain the psychology behind how good habits are built and bad habits are broken.

Clear explains, “This all boils down to what I call the four laws of behavior change, which is a central theme in my book. There are many ways to approach it.”

When it comes to building a good habit, Clear emphasizes the importance of four key factors. “On the other hand, breaking a bad habit requires the opposite of these four factors that are essential for building a good habit,” he says.

This concept of the four laws forms the foundation of Clear’s philosophy. For more insights from Clear, be sure to listen to the full podcast. However, we’ll do our best to break down these four laws for you.

How to Build Better Habits

The first law of habit-building? You need to make your new habit “obvious.” This means placing visual cues in plain sight to remind you of your goal. “You want the cues of your habits to be obvious, available, visible, easy to see,” explains Clear.

Secondly, you want to make the new habit “attractive.” A good habit becomes enticing when associated with positive feelings. “The more compelling, motivating, or enticing it is, the better off you are,” says Clear.

Thirdly, you want to make it “easy.” Simplify the process of adopting a good habit to reduce friction, making it almost effortless to do. Clear explains, “Scaling it down, reducing friction. And then you want to make it satisfying, more rewarding or beneficial, the more enjoyable it feels, the more likely you are to repeat it.”

Lastly, you want to make the habit feel satisfying. If you can find a way to celebrate your progress that feels good to you (and doesn’t sabotage it), you’ll be more likely to make further progress. Reward yourself after completing a good habit to reinforce it.

So what does this look like in practice? For example, let’s say you want to start exercising regularly. Improving your health can often feel overwhelming and daunting, but if you take it one step at a time and apply Clear’s framework, it can feel much more doable.

• Make It Obvious: Place your workout gear in a visible spot. This way, you will be more likely to use it.
• Make It Attractive: Choose a workout routine you enjoy. If you like music, try dancing. If you love watching a certain sport, try playing it. When you have a passion or joy for what you are doing, you will see the activity as less of a chore.
• Make It Easy: Start with short, manageable sessions. To quote Simon, “Dream big, start small, but most of all, start.”
• Make It Satisfying: You completed your first week of regular workouts? That’s amazing! Go see a movie you’ve been wanting to watch. Reward yourself with a healthy treat post-workout. Buy those workout leggings you’ve heard great things about. Celebrate the fact that you stuck with it and continue to do so as you feed your new habit.

It’s as certain as death and taxes, and as inevitable as the rising sun. It’s also as unavoidable as news headlines about Taylor Swift’s personal life. If you’re at a networking event, in a job interview, or in any meeting where you’re not the key figure, you’re bound to encounter the classic non-question question: “Tell me about yourself.”

Sure, you can argue endlessly about the usefulness of this commonly used conversation starter. Is “tell me about yourself” a lazy way to initiate a conversation? Perhaps. Is it a creative icebreaker? Definitely not. However, at the end of the day, it presents an opportunity for you to shine as an individual and demonstrate to your interviewer how you are unique, impressive, and memorable. We firmly believe in this.

That’s why, at The Optimism Company, we decided to seek the wisdom of Simon Sinek, our founder and Chief Optimist, for his go-to advice on confidently navigating the “tell me about yourself” question. 

Whether you’re prepping for an interview or you’d simply like to have your answer to this question holstered and ready to go at any time, we’d like to help you. So, read on, and if you’re interested in more valuable guidance on communicating clearly and effectively, be sure to explore Simon’s #1 bestselling course, The Art of Presenting, today.

Yes, You Should Prepare for the “Tell Me About Yourself” Question

“Let’s be clear, your response to the ‘tell me about yourself’ question should never be spontaneous,” advises Simon. It’s a fact that you know it’s coming, and while some may dismiss it as mere small talk, the truth is that it holds much more significance. It’s your initial opportunity to make an impression and artfully highlight your strengths.

However, let’s first address why the “tell me about yourself” question often leaves people stumbling: it requires talking about oneself. For those who feel uncomfortable discussing themselves, it can be stressful. And for those who are at ease with self-expression, it can be challenging to strike a balance between confidence and sounding boastful.

That being said, Simon encourages you to have a prepared answer. While there are countless approaches you can take, he offers at least two foolproof options.

Option One: Shift the Focus from Yourself to Your Friends

Not a fan of discussing yourself? Here’s a quick solution: Don’t. Instead, redirect the answer towards your friends.

“Here’s what you can say: ‘I find it challenging to talk about myself, so perhaps it’s easier to share the most common compliment I get, which could reveal something unique about who I am.’ In my case, the most common compliment I receive is that I am inspiring. So I would explain how I take pride in my ability to inspire others.”

Simon also emphasizes the importance of a unique answer. “It’s all about how you respond,” he explains. “If your words spark curiosity in the listener’s mind, that’s a plus. Merely saying that you’re a hard worker or a good son won’t capture their attention. What they truly want to hear are words that resonate with them.”

It’s no secret that the internet is bursting with all sorts of advice on public speaking, some of it backed by science (don’t forget to breathe), some of it poetic (“train the butterflies in your stomach to fly in formation and use them positively”), and some of it downright strange (see: “picture your audience in their underwear”).

However, questionable advice always thrives online due to the high demand for it. At the end of the day, public speaking is incredibly difficult and undeniably stressful, especially without practice. If you struggle with public speaking, we’d like to help.

Our founder and Chief Optimist, Simon Sinek, has studied the art of effective public speaking for nearly two decades and performed countless talks to audiences of all sizes. When asked to distill his most powerful tip for public speaking—the one that rises above all the rest—his answer is simple.

“I have one very important rule in public speaking, and that’s that you have to show up to give,” he says. “Very often, before I walk out on stage, I will say to myself out loud, ‘You’re here to give.'”

“How do you actually know if you’re on a trusting team?”

It’s a simple question that Simon asks in his recently released program for teams, Unleash Your Infinite Mindset. His virtual, self-paced program is designed to challenge you and your colleagues to think differently, communicate more openly and honestly, and build a strong and supportive culture.

According to Simon, the answer lies in psychologically safety. He explains, “It’s when you feel comfortable saying at any point, ‘I made a mistake,’ or ‘I don’t know.’ You can actually say aloud, ‘You’ve put me in a position where I feel as though I need more training,’ and you can do so without any fear of humiliation or retribution.”

It all raises the question: What can you do to help build trust within your own team? 

Read on for Simon’s advice. And if you’re interested in learning more about Simon’s new training programs, including both Unleash Your Infinite Mindset and The Art of Building Fiercely Loyal Customers (taught by famed restaurateur Will Guidara, whose Eleven Madison Park was the #1 ranked restaurant in the world), click here.

There are countless ways in which organizations can undermine the trust of their employees, some of which are more apparent than others. (Mass layoffs? Yes. False promises from leadership? Check. Excessive micromanagement with no autonomy? Absolutely.) However, as Simon reveals, there is at least one way you may be unintentionally eroding the trust of your troops that can be easily avoided. What’s more, even well-intentioned leaders make this error all the time. As Simon explains, “I’ve never met a CEO who doesn’t consider their people important. The issue lies in where they prioritize their people within the hierarchy.”

Having spent countless hours within organizations, Simon has gained valuable insights into how top leaders prioritize their business, purpose, and goals. “I’ve seen so many corporate presentations where CEOs outline their ‘priorities,'” he says. “Usually, number one is growth, number two is shareholder value, number three is the customer, and number four is ‘our employees.'”

Even if the priorities are not explicitly ranked in such a way, the emphasis on “our employees” is almost invariably mentioned last. 

Related: If you’re looking to build a strong culture within your organization, don’t miss the 50+ courses from The Optimism Library, which include world-class lessons on trust, innovation, and leadership. 

While this may seem well-intentioned, it immediately undermines the value of your employees. “You can claim to care about your people because they’re listed at number four,” Simon says. “However, the issue lies in the hierarchy of that list, which raises the question: Are you willing to sacrifice your people to achieve a target? That’s what the list implies, and that’s the message it conveys to those working within the organization.”

It’s simply a fact that if employees do not feel valued, cared for, or prioritized by the company, it becomes unrealistic to expect them to reciprocate those sentiments towards the company. This lack of trust hinders the cultivation of a positive work environment, employee satisfaction, and the attainment of optimal performance.

“In organizations that consistently outperform their competitors, the well-being of their people takes precedence,” says Simon. “They prioritize protecting their employees over short-term gains.”

Our founder and Chief Optimist, Simon Sinek, author of the bestselling book “Find Your WHY,” defines your “WHY” as the contribution you make to the world. It encompasses both your professional and personal purpose. According to Simon, it is a reflection of who we are as individuals. When Simon discovered his own WHY, it became a lens through which he viewed the world, influencing his decision-making and transforming his life. He jokingly adds, “I’m still the same idiot I was before, but I learned how to start with why and live my life with purpose.”

If you’re interested in how to find your purpose and uncovering your own WHY, it requires dedicated self-discovery. Simon can assist you in this process through our on-demand video course, “Find Your WHY.” (You can learn more about it here.) However, there is a simple way to begin by exploring your WHY on your own. It only takes a few minutes of your time and a conversation with a close friend.

Simon advises against doing this exercise with a spouse or family member, as those relationships are often too close and may not provide an objective perspective. By engaging with a trusted friend, you can gain fresh insights and an expert perspective on your journey to finding your purpose.

To begin, sit down with one of your closest friends and pose a single question to them: “Why are we friends?”

As they grapple for the right words, you will need to encourage them to delve deeper. Explain that this is an exercise aimed at gaining self-awareness, and it’s crucial that they collaborate with you to answer the question.

Typically, your friend will start by using common clichés to describe your friendship, such as “you’re always there” or “I can trust you.” You will need to push them to dig deeper. Simon explains, “You’ll have to challenge them and play devil’s advocate because phrases like that only scratch the surface of what defines a friend.” So, push further by asking, “What specific qualities or actions about me make you confident that you would support me unconditionally?”

They may continue to express uncertainty, saying things like, “I don’t know. This is a difficult question.” In these moments, allow them to keep talking. Maintain silence, actively listen, and above all, let them struggle to find the right words. It may seem like they are going in circles, but keep listening attentively.

Eventually, they will begin to describe themselves. Their sentences will start with phrases like “I feel…”, “You make me feel…”, and “When I’m around you, I feel…”

If the right words are spoken, you will experience an emotional response. You may feel goosebumps or become teary-eyed because they are articulating the value you hold in their lives. This emotional reaction serves as an indicator. As Simon explains, “This is when you realize that you’re in your element, and you’re now getting closer to understanding your WHY.”