Author: Emily Priddy

It’s as certain as death and taxes, and as inevitable as the rising sun. It’s also as unavoidable as news headlines about Taylor Swift’s personal life. If you’re at a networking event, in a job interview, or in any meeting where you’re not the key figure, you’re bound to encounter the classic non-question question: “Tell me about yourself.”

Sure, you can argue endlessly about the usefulness of this commonly used conversation starter. Is “tell me about yourself” a lazy way to initiate a conversation? Perhaps. Is it a creative icebreaker? Definitely not. However, at the end of the day, it presents an opportunity for you to shine as an individual and demonstrate to your interviewer how you are unique, impressive, and memorable. We firmly believe in this.

That’s why, at The Optimism Company, we decided to seek the wisdom of Simon Sinek, our founder and Chief Optimist, for his go-to advice on confidently navigating the “tell me about yourself” question. 

Whether you’re prepping for an interview or you’d simply like to have your answer to this question holstered and ready to go at any time, we’d like to help you. So, read on, and if you’re interested in more valuable guidance on communicating clearly and effectively, be sure to explore Simon’s #1 bestselling course, The Art of Presenting, today.

Yes, You Should Prepare for the “Tell Me About Yourself” Question

“Let’s be clear, your response to the ‘tell me about yourself’ question should never be spontaneous,” advises Simon. It’s a fact that you know it’s coming, and while some may dismiss it as mere small talk, the truth is that it holds much more significance. It’s your initial opportunity to make an impression and artfully highlight your strengths.

However, let’s first address why the “tell me about yourself” question often leaves people stumbling: it requires talking about oneself. For those who feel uncomfortable discussing themselves, it can be stressful. And for those who are at ease with self-expression, it can be challenging to strike a balance between confidence and sounding boastful.

That being said, Simon encourages you to have a prepared answer. While there are countless approaches you can take, he offers at least two foolproof options.

Option One: Shift the Focus from Yourself to Your Friends

Not a fan of discussing yourself? Here’s a quick solution: Don’t. Instead, redirect the answer towards your friends.

“Here’s what you can say: ‘I find it challenging to talk about myself, so perhaps it’s easier to share the most common compliment I get, which could reveal something unique about who I am.’ In my case, the most common compliment I receive is that I am inspiring. So I would explain how I take pride in my ability to inspire others.”

Simon also emphasizes the importance of a unique answer. “It’s all about how you respond,” he explains. “If your words spark curiosity in the listener’s mind, that’s a plus. Merely saying that you’re a hard worker or a good son won’t capture their attention. What they truly want to hear are words that resonate with them.”

It’s no secret that the internet is bursting with all sorts of advice on public speaking, some of it backed by science (don’t forget to breathe), some of it poetic (“train the butterflies in your stomach to fly in formation and use them positively”), and some of it downright strange (see: “picture your audience in their underwear”).

However, questionable advice always thrives online due to the high demand for it. At the end of the day, public speaking is incredibly difficult and undeniably stressful, especially without practice. If you struggle with public speaking, we’d like to help.

Our founder and Chief Optimist, Simon Sinek, has studied the art of effective public speaking for nearly two decades and performed countless talks to audiences of all sizes. When asked to distill his most powerful tip for public speaking—the one that rises above all the rest—his answer is simple.

“I have one very important rule in public speaking, and that’s that you have to show up to give,” he says. “Very often, before I walk out on stage, I will say to myself out loud, ‘You’re here to give.'”

“How do you actually know if you’re on a trusting team?”

It’s a simple question that Simon asks in his recently released program for teams, Unleash Your Infinite Mindset. His virtual, self-paced program is designed to challenge you and your colleagues to think differently, communicate more openly and honestly, and build a strong and supportive culture.

According to Simon, the answer lies in psychologically safety. He explains, “It’s when you feel comfortable saying at any point, ‘I made a mistake,’ or ‘I don’t know.’ You can actually say aloud, ‘You’ve put me in a position where I feel as though I need more training,’ and you can do so without any fear of humiliation or retribution.”

It all raises the question: What can you do to help build trust within your own team? 

Read on for Simon’s advice. And if you’re interested in learning more about Simon’s new training programs, including both Unleash Your Infinite Mindset and The Art of Building Fiercely Loyal Customers (taught by famed restaurateur Will Guidara, whose Eleven Madison Park was the #1 ranked restaurant in the world), click here.

There are countless ways in which organizations can undermine the trust of their employees, some of which are more apparent than others. (Mass layoffs? Yes. False promises from leadership? Check. Excessive micromanagement with no autonomy? Absolutely.) However, as Simon reveals, there is at least one way you may be unintentionally eroding the trust of your troops that can be easily avoided. What’s more, even well-intentioned leaders make this error all the time. As Simon explains, “I’ve never met a CEO who doesn’t consider their people important. The issue lies in where they prioritize their people within the hierarchy.”

Having spent countless hours within organizations, Simon has gained valuable insights into how top leaders prioritize their business, purpose, and goals. “I’ve seen so many corporate presentations where CEOs outline their ‘priorities,'” he says. “Usually, number one is growth, number two is shareholder value, number three is the customer, and number four is ‘our employees.'”

Even if the priorities are not explicitly ranked in such a way, the emphasis on “our employees” is almost invariably mentioned last. 

Related: If you’re looking to build a strong culture within your organization, don’t miss the 50+ courses from The Optimism Library, which include world-class lessons on trust, innovation, and leadership. 

While this may seem well-intentioned, it immediately undermines the value of your employees. “You can claim to care about your people because they’re listed at number four,” Simon says. “However, the issue lies in the hierarchy of that list, which raises the question: Are you willing to sacrifice your people to achieve a target? That’s what the list implies, and that’s the message it conveys to those working within the organization.”

It’s simply a fact that if employees do not feel valued, cared for, or prioritized by the company, it becomes unrealistic to expect them to reciprocate those sentiments towards the company. This lack of trust hinders the cultivation of a positive work environment, employee satisfaction, and the attainment of optimal performance.

“In organizations that consistently outperform their competitors, the well-being of their people takes precedence,” says Simon. “They prioritize protecting their employees over short-term gains.”

Our founder and Chief Optimist, Simon Sinek, author of the bestselling book “Find Your WHY,” defines your “WHY” as the contribution you make to the world. It encompasses both your professional and personal purpose. According to Simon, it is a reflection of who we are as individuals. When Simon discovered his own WHY, it became a lens through which he viewed the world, influencing his decision-making and transforming his life. He jokingly adds, “I’m still the same idiot I was before, but I learned how to start with why and live my life with purpose.”

If you’re interested in how to find your purpose and uncovering your own WHY, it requires dedicated self-discovery. Simon can assist you in this process through our on-demand video course, “Find Your WHY.” (You can learn more about it here.) However, there is a simple way to begin by exploring your WHY on your own. It only takes a few minutes of your time and a conversation with a close friend.

Simon advises against doing this exercise with a spouse or family member, as those relationships are often too close and may not provide an objective perspective. By engaging with a trusted friend, you can gain fresh insights and an expert perspective on your journey to finding your purpose.

To begin, sit down with one of your closest friends and pose a single question to them: “Why are we friends?”

As they grapple for the right words, you will need to encourage them to delve deeper. Explain that this is an exercise aimed at gaining self-awareness, and it’s crucial that they collaborate with you to answer the question.

Typically, your friend will start by using common clichés to describe your friendship, such as “you’re always there” or “I can trust you.” You will need to push them to dig deeper. Simon explains, “You’ll have to challenge them and play devil’s advocate because phrases like that only scratch the surface of what defines a friend.” So, push further by asking, “What specific qualities or actions about me make you confident that you would support me unconditionally?”

They may continue to express uncertainty, saying things like, “I don’t know. This is a difficult question.” In these moments, allow them to keep talking. Maintain silence, actively listen, and above all, let them struggle to find the right words. It may seem like they are going in circles, but keep listening attentively.

Eventually, they will begin to describe themselves. Their sentences will start with phrases like “I feel…”, “You make me feel…”, and “When I’m around you, I feel…”

If the right words are spoken, you will experience an emotional response. You may feel goosebumps or become teary-eyed because they are articulating the value you hold in their lives. This emotional reaction serves as an indicator. As Simon explains, “This is when you realize that you’re in your element, and you’re now getting closer to understanding your WHY.”

If you’ve ever felt like your limitations are holding you back in your career or struggle with feelings of inadequacy, we’ve got a recommendation that might just inspire you. Take 90 minutes and check out the newly released Netflix documentary “Sly” about the life and career of Hollywood legend Sylvester Stallone. It doesn’t matter if you’re a fan of 80s action movies or you’re a sucker for 90s nostalgia, Stallone’s story is one of triumph and staying true to your purpose. Honestly, it left many of us deeply moved.

Among the details revealed in the documentary is that the entire Rocky franchise came into existence because Stallone, who was often typecast as a “thug” with few lines, wrote the script for himself when he couldn’t land a leading role. He was even offered hefty sums of money not to play the part after his script was well-received. At every turn of his career, Stallone—admittedly a very complicated man—continually embraced both his weaknesses and his strengths as he created the life he wanted with unwavering determination. 

The film is brimming with valuable life lessons and insightful wisdom from Stallone. Stallone, much like us, firmly believes in the power of maintaining an optimistic mindset when it comes to achieving success. “I believe any success in life is made by going into an area with a blind, furious optimism,” he says.

Simultaneously, Stallone emphasizes the importance of embracing failures along the way. “Success is usually the culmination of controlling failure,” he astutely explains. In another poignant moment in the film, he shares his perspective on rejection, viewing it as a wake-up call rather than a signal to retreat. “I take rejection as someone blowing a bugle in my ear to wake me up and get me going,” he remarks.

For those who possess a passion or purpose, Stallone advises wholehearted dedication and obsession in its pursuit. “I am not the richest, smartest, or most talented person in the world,” he humbly acknowledges. “But I succeed because I keep going and going and going.”

Towards the end of the film, Stallone, at the age of 77, encapsulates his outlook by stating, “I’m in the hope business.” He firmly believes in happy endings, and so do we. If you’re seeking a boost of optimism and a reminder that you can overcome obstacles, we’d recommend watching “Sly.” And if you’re interested in discovering your own purpose, be sure to explore Simon’s insightful course titled Find Your WHY by clicking right here.